Linus Van Pelt on Hoarders
Image by Bearman, Story by Dan Soto
Former child star, Linus Van Pelt (no relation to Stephanie Van Pelt), has been tapped to be featured on an upcoming episode of the hit show “Hoarders”.
Recently, ToonMZ, spent a few minutes with Linus about his upcoming appearance.
“It’s all Lucy and Snoopy’s fault” (referring to his older sister Lucy Van Pelt and his best friends dog). “For years, they tried to take my blanket and I successfully fended them off each and every time. Then one day, I got up to get my bottle of Makers Mark and took my eyes off my blanket for a split second. That was the moment Lucy and Snoopy had been waiting on forever.”
After a few moments to blot his eyes, Linus continued his story.
“It was at that moment that I realized I needed a backup plan. I needed more blankets. I knew I would not survive this cruel life with only one blanket and cruel friends. I have spent every day of my life finding and storing every blanket I could get my pudgy little fingers on. Salvation Army, Goodwill, Wal-Mart and anywhere I can find a blanket either old or new, is not safe.”
ToonMZ was not able to get a direct (or honest) estimate from Linus about how many blankets he has collected but our team of expert guestimators was able to get a quick peek in his condo and came up with approximately 1,924,000 blankets.
Update: ToonMZ has just learned that the estate of the late Charles Schultz has given its blessing to an upcoming “Peanuts” special entitled “It’s the Great Hoarder, Charlie Brown”
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ROFL! I knew he had to have more than one. How else could it have not been totally ratty after being dragged everywhere?
Red.
Well he screamed like a baby when they tried to launder that thing.
I can’t stop laughing at Linus’ expression. His look alone is worht the price of the whole cartoon. Good job, man! I know he’s got Sally buried somewhere underneath all that junk.
If his expression is all I needed I could have saved time drawing that damn background. YOu know I hate backgrounds.
haha….. you should sell the video
It would be an instant hit.
That’s a lifetime of hoarding indeed. Can’t wait to see how this turns out.
Have a terrific day.
Well since I only draw one panel you will have to make up the rest of the story.
Perfect, Bearman! Love it! Happiness is a cluttered house full of warm blankets!
As long as they are flame retardant.
oh dear god this is one of your best yet! still laughing; literally out loud. Thanks again for your humor, sense of the absurd, creativity and as always..fabulous cartoon.
Thanks R!! I can’t believe I have kept up with these things.
I’ve heard he hoards peanuts, too.
Yes but they are actually peanut M&M’s so he hoards the chocolate too.
And those peanut characters, too.
Better than circus peanuts. *shudder*
Red.
yech…those are gross!!!
That is absolutely hilarious–ingeniously original!
Thanks Scott
I really love these child star things.
I thought I would do one or two but each week I keep coming up with more.
OMG! Thanks for starting off my day with a good laugh!…one of your funniest yet, Bearman!
Thanks Deb…much appreciated.
I never figured out how Linus could get away with dragging his blanket all over the place without getting smacked around and I couldn’t…
You still carry a blanket??
HA!
Guess who has been spending a little too much time at Bed Bath & Beyond!?
(And no – it’s not me – they won’t let me in the parking lot)
That’s because you keep claiming someone stole your 20% coupon
Starts with a blanket, then another blanket – and another. Psychiatric help is available, Linus.
Are washcloths the gateway drug to blankets??
Those and hand towels
Exactly
See this is why I’m glad to have internet, toons such as this make it all worth the while.. Hi Bearman I missed these
Well look who it is….howdy stranger.
Sorry that it has been awhile been with out internet for some time now..
Glad you made it back…
I’ve also heard that Marcie was found to have an addiction to eating Peppermint Patties! I think she was on an episode of “celebrity rehab”.
I’ve also heard the red haired girl went missing, was last seen with a bald guy wearing yellow!
I’ll stop now! o.O [wink]
OK the visual of Marcie “eating” PP made me crack up!!! I think that is an episode of the Real L Word.
But if you take away all of those blankets, you take away all of his security!
He needs more Social Security
Awesome, couldn’t have made it sound any more real, I love it.
Well you could have. I tire of coming up with all this comedy. Someone else needs to take a turn..haha
I can understand that
Yet you will still go on like I said nothing..haha
Funny. I like where you are going with this Toon MZ.
Now if I can just keep it up. Thanks
Ha ,ha Looks like Linus also put on a few lb’s as he got older.
Haven’t we all?
Up next, Lucy Van Pelt’s football fetish and the kite eating tree shares his top ten most edible kites!
Only on the Cartoon Underworld!
shhh…don’t give away the story.
That’s nothing…you should see PigPen’s place. Too gruesome for the censors to show!
I figured he would be OCD by now.
Wow, he really let himself go!
What else does he have to do. He is making Peanuts royalty.
I think you are really on to somethin’. The possibilities are endless…Eddie Haskel…Dennis the Menace. I would love to see how Margaret turned out. You could even use nursery rhymes. I really love these.
ha. I had not thought of nursery rhymes.
I have been pondering them for years.
HA! I just love the concept of a ToonMZ.
Thanks Doc…good to see you found your way to G+
He was child star of what show? Unless you mean he was a cartoon child star but then I didn’t know Linus had a last name. Linus was the piano player right? Did pig-pen have a name?
One last question – Bearman do you hoard cartoons?
I am playing off the fact that as a child Linus was a child star of Peanuts as if he was an actual actor.
Yes he did. You are thinking of Schroeder. He played the piano.
I think pig-pen was his name. Don’t know if he had a birth name.
NO. Everything is on my computer. I don’t know where people who draw the stuff by hand on boards keep the stuff.
I blame Charlie Brown’s sister. Her constant sexual harassment brought him to this!
Sexual???
Love this one Bearman, I love all your comics but this one is extra great. You just never know what childhood suffering will lead to. Who ever thought Linus would turn blanket hoarder? I thought that one solitary favourite blankie would be all he would need for his emotional support.
But it was Lucy and Snoopy always stealing his blanket that made him need backups