Bearman Cartoon: Nicolas Cage Burial Suit

Bearman Cartoon - Nicolas Cage Superman Pyramid

So actor Nicolas Cage has decided that despite his financial issues and inability to reign in his purchases, he would prepare for his final resting place the best way he saw fit.  By purchasing a mausoleum in Louisiana shaped like a Pyramid.

It is no secret that old Nic fancies the man in tights either.  He wanted to play the title role when the Superman franchise was remade and his fanboy love drove him to name his son Kal-el (Superman’s real name from Krypton).  I am all for preparing so your family isn’t stuck with the bill and you can make sure your final wishes are fulfilled.  But, couldn’t you sort out some of your financial mess first.  I guess whatever he spent is just a drop in the bucket of the $14 million in taxes he currently owes.

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70 Responses to “Bearman Cartoon: Nicolas Cage Burial Suit”

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  1. Sounds to me like he is cutting back, Bearman. A 9ft pyramid? Come on, N.C. – according to Wikipedia the Great Pyramid was over 480 Ft. tall at the time of it’s construction! So sad. So very, very sad! 🙂

  2. DadaHyena says:

    What’s wrong with a good old-fashioned Viking funeral?

    Hell, if you want something memorable do what Hunter S. Thompson did: have your ashes shot out of a cannon!

  3. susispice says:

    I have the scoop

    there is a perfectly good explanation for all this…

    Cage saw a psychic who told him he was a great Pharaoh in a past life and so he saw that a pyramid was best fitting for him as he is also intending to be mummified once he is dead thanks to the IRS and he will live on in the next life …

    • Bearman says:

      Well if he was a great pharoah he should have to pay for it. Get some people willing to build it. Or just move into an existing one. We already raped those for anything of value.

  4. Friggin Loon says:

    Geez, I’d have thought he would have wanted to be buried in an Elvis jumpsuit. Oh and be sure, Nicolas Cage will be living in that pyramid long before he dies if the IRS have anything to do with it. It’s probably the only property the taxman can’t get his mitts on! You should never trust your financial adviser fool !

  5. FJ says:

    Maybe you could put an “IR” in front of the ‘S’.

  6. Friggin Loon says:

    Hey Bearman, me thinks your Nicolas Cage looks like Vincent Shiavelli…I’m just saying ….

  7. kyknoord says:

    Ye gods! I am *so* jealous.

  8. Bo Lumpkin says:

    I can’t imagine how irresponsible you would have to be to owe $14 million in taxes. Don’t any of these rich guys know anything about math and about putting a little away for a rainy day. By the way, a real elaborate funeral down here would be to be buried in a double-wide mobile home.

    • Roland says:

      unfortunately, these rich guys have other people handle their money. They don’t find out till it’s too late that they’ve been hornswaggled! I mean geez, you would think if you have “too much” money that you can’t handle it alone, the least you could do is monitor what is being done with it instead of just trusting someone to take care of it.

  9. Roland says:

    you know if he were to wear that suit long enough, he might think he could just fly around the world really fast backwards and stop himself from hiring his accountant… then we’ll get to see that scene acted out from the Kick-Ass trailer. And on a side note, is it just me or does that guy in the bird suit look very much like that old Disney movie Condorman?

  10. jammer5 says:

    I’m sure nick will be living in his IRS owned pyramid long after he’s dead as well. I’m afraid the guy will never go away.

  11. David says:

    It’s all part of his pyramid scheme… wacka, wacka

  12. George says:

    Maybe they could just drop him somewhere in the vicinity of the Fortress of Solitude and be done with it. 🙂

  13. Nate Fakes says:

    Cool. Maybe this will influence ‘Saved By The Bell’s’ Screech to bury himself in a locker.

  14. Friggin Loon says:

    I heard a rumor they are going to film National Treasure 3 around it (tax deductible people!).

  15. Tony says:

    He looks rather spiffy in the supersuit. Can a mere pyramid hold a super hero??? I must admit that Guarding Tess is the only Nick movie I’ve ever seen & I quite liked it.

  16. lynn says:

    okay, don’t be hat’in because of this comment but nic cage is a horrible actor! the only movie he was actually good in (IMHO) was Raising Arizona. btw b-man, you did a fabulous job on the cartoon image of him. it was spot on!

    • Bearman says:

      Raising Arizona sucked. It was hilarious when it came out. Then I rewatched it and it sucked..haha

      national treasure, conair, the Rock. All classic.

  17. MJ says:

    I enjoy watching some of his movies, but not all. He seems a little off kilter. Funny materaial as usual. Ha!

  18. Don Mills says:

    A good Nicolas Cage, Bearman. Looks just like him, actually. Nicely done.

  19. WriterDood says:

    What, he’s not being launched into space? Man, if I were NC, I’d definitely go for the space launch. He should spring for the full meal deal and have his brain frozen in carbonite and blasted off toward Alpha Centauri or something. Maybe aliens will find it and think it’s something valuable. Or it will end up as a paperweight on some alien’s desk. Who knows.

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