Tag: cartoon

Kim Davis and Kathy Bates Cartoon Mashup

I bring you the Kim Davis and Kathy Bates (Misery) Mash up. Watching the news on the Clerk in Kentucky who refused to issue marriage licenses to gay couples, her outfit reminded me of ones Kathy Bates wore in Misery. Someone else must have noticed it too because I saw floating around a photo image that had something like “Separated at Birth”

I know the line from Misery is “You’re just another lying, old, dirty birdy”, but there isn’t just one in this case it seems. It’s all of us. Enjoy the weekend. Don’t take any sledgehammers to the leg.

September 4, 2015
Sneezing Etiquette

I never understood sneezing etiquette. I always tend to sneeze in my hand. Then after I sneeze I can either wash my hand if necessary or use some hand cleaner to eradicate any lingering germs. But everyone always tells me I am doing it wrong and that is unsanitary. Rather, the proper way to sneeze is to do so in the crook of your arm.

HOWEVER, it seems like every time I try to follow the etiquette proscribed, I hock a huge wad of phlegm out of my mouth and nose as shown in today’s cartoon. So now I am walking around with a huge loogie on my arm trying to conceal the fact that it is there from others. And of course I have to run to the bathroom to try and clean snot off my shirt.

So what gives? Anyone have the same predicament? How do you sneeze? And for those that comment….”BLESS YOU.”

August 31, 2015
Understanding German – Rathaus

We continue our “Understanding German Cartoon Series” with the German word “Rathaus” (see Ausfahrt in case you missed that one). In every small town this word is prevalent on signs and a central building. It simply means “Town Hall” or “City Hall”. But for those of us in the States who deal with a bunch of political rats in power, it can take on a whole new meaning.

Stay tuned…more to come later this week.

August 17, 2015
Understanding German – Ausfahrt

Having never been exposed to much German except for a few bars of Wayne Newton’s Danke Schoen (thanks Ferris Bueller – you are a righteous dude), I was pleasantly surprised at all the words I found funny traveling the last few weeks in Europe. So today I give you the first German word that might need translation for those of us not so up on our Germanic languages.

AUSFAHRT– noun

1. Garage Exit

2. Highway Exit Ramp

Now of course we Americans giggle like little school girls when we try to say it because invariably it always comes out “Ass Fart” Again I claim it still works as the gas is exiting from your system through your ass.

August 12, 2015
Damn Confusing French Words

Those damn confusing Middle French words will screw you up every single time.

Duvet – (origin Middle French) noun

1. a usually down-filled quilt, often with a removable cover; comforter.

Bidet- (origin Middle French) noun

1. a low, basinlike bathroom fixture, usually with spigots, used for bathing the genital and perineal areas.

(Source)

In getting ready to go on a trip, my wife dictated a list of items we needed to do/get. One of them was to clean the comforter. So in my list I wrote, “Clean Duvet”. She hadn’t ever used the term duvet and thought I had thrown a joke in the list and when I questioned her, she said pretty much what the cartoon implies.

Ever been confused by similar sounding words/phrases? Be out of touch for the next couple weeks (or minimal) so talk amongst yourselves.

July 26, 2015
Trump Motivates the Troops

Presidential Candidate Donald Trump must have felt empowered after announcing his Presidential Candidacy including this statement:

“When Mexico sends its people, they’re not sending their best. They’re not sending you. They’re not sending you. They’re sending people that have lots of problems, and they’re bringing those problems with us. They’re bringing drugs. They’re bringing crime. They’re rapists. And some, I assume, are good people.”

Well what most might think there’s another egotistical celebrity/rich man using the Presidential campaign to draw attention to their outlandish notions, it seemed to have worked. Trump has surged ahead of the rest of the Republicans.

But now some are claiming he bombastic remarks have gone to far, thus marking the point of his decline. Senator and former POW John McCain has been going after Trump on his plans for Immigration Reform. In discussing the Senator, Trump said

“He was a war hero because he was captured. I like people who weren’t captured.”

Makes you wonder as this editorial cartoon ponders what else he might say to our current troops and veterans.

July 19, 2015
Ariana Grande is now a Specialty Donut

Looks like singer Ariana Grande is going have a specialty doughnut named after her. It is “dripping” with goodness. The “most moist donut” you can find. OK kidding aside, Ariana made news this week having been caught with her boyfriend licking donuts in a store. See the details and the video at TMZ.

Seems she went further stating “I hate Americans. I hate America.” That got the net in an uproar. Her spot at the All-Star Concert in Cincinnati was given to Demi Lovato (Grande claims last minute oral surgery was to blame). Now to her credit, I believe Grande when she explained that she was talking about our obsession with food was where her comment was emanating from. Yet she never did say anything about french kissing the French Cruller.

(I think I need to open up a Doughnut shop called DEEZ (do)NUTs!)

July 10, 2015
You Are What You Eat

You are what you eat. Ever said that line to someone trying to be funny. Well, true story, this what the response I got recently. I was at a client and brought in some AIRHEADS (Taffy Candy for those not familiar). Gave one to a woman I barely knew and pretty much the exchange in the cartoon is exactly what happened. Left me so flabbergasted I was left speechless (very rare) and just had to laugh and walk away. Someone else claimed she was hitting on me but I think she was just trying to prove that she was a bigger smart ass than I am.

Every been in a situation where you have been one upped?

July 3, 2015
Confederate Flag

With the mass killings last week in the church in South Carolina by a guy hoping to start a race war, there have been renewed calls for the South Carolina state government to remove the Confederate Flag from the state capitol. I understand the calls that the Flag is a historic article that should be preserved, whether in Civil War reenactments or as historical teachings. However, it should, in my opinion, NOT be a sanctioned flag that is flown by any local, state or federal government. Because then we move from it being a historic item to be debated and discussed to a state sponsored reminder that not everyone is welcome.

June 22, 2015
Can You Hear Me Now?
Can you hear me now? Not only is that an old Verizon slogan, but it seems to be a recurring issue with me. You see I don’t pay attention to something many times until it is important to me. And it doesn’t mean what you have to say isn’t important, but when it is task related, I tend to tune out until I need to accomplish the task.

For example, if you said “Hey could you send me Bob’s address when you get home”, I will say “send me an email/text” because I know that even though it is important to you, my brain is constantly moving so I will most likely forget. This infuriates my wife, who will tell me multiple times what she needs at the grocery store, but unless I am there and talking to her on the phone or she tells me right before I leave, I will most likely forget because I didn’t expend the energy to put it into my long term memory. She now knows to just give me a written list. Now if I could only find that damn list.

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Charity Challenge Final Results

Cartoonist using “Bearman” in their cartoons ($10 each):
- Jon Esparza at Jon’s Crazy Stuff
- Cha at Dontchawannadream
- Christopher L
New Google Plus Followers ($1 each)
- 284!!
Week 3 Grand Total of $314 which once again puts us at the max payout of $1500. Pulling out the checkbook now.
June 3, 2015