This Montanan (aka Guy from Montana) was standing out on the beach one day, and there were swarms of girls around him. A nearby North Dakotan (aka Guy from North Dakota) was jealously looking on and wondering why the Montanan was getting all the girls. This went on for a couple of days, when finally the North Dakotan was sick of it, so he approached the Montanan in the bathroom and insisted on knowing what his secret was. “How do you attract all those women?” he demanded. “You don’t have anything I don’t have!”

“Well,” said the Montanan. “I’ll tell you my secret. I put a potato down my shorts.”

The North Dakotan laughed with evil glee, imaging all of the women who would now flock to his potato-clad body, and went home to get a potato. Later that day he came back, but to his surprise the women didn’t want anything to do with him. In fact, the seemed more repulsed than ever (if that was possible). So, angry and alone, the North Dakotan waited in the bathroom until the Montanan showed up to drain his lizard, and then the North Dakotan accosted him for the lie, chastising his lack of integrity. “You are a LIAR!” he declared. “I am just like you. I have the same haircut, I have the same shorts, I have the same footgear, I’m driving the same car, and I even bought cologne that smells like yours. Now I’ve got a potato down my pants, and the women STILL don’t want anything to do with me. WHAT GIVES!?”

“Well,” said the Montanan, “I’ll tell you what, the potato goes in front.”